answers to your questions

GIRL:
You've mentioned that being away from America has given you some perspective on the country. What have you recognized as

1. things you dislike (ex: people being driven by careers)

STASH:
I dislike the sense of entitlement that drives the wealthier citizens of the world (not exclusively north Americans) to distort desires into needs. I need the space and safety to enjoy the freedom that I am entitled to so I need a house with a lawn and my own car to travel to and from there. The benchmarks of a successful life are skewed towards material wealth and, in North America, the interest in keeping things that way is overwhelming; the well-being of the country relies too heavily on that. Maybe things are starting to change now.

I also dislike acute nationalism, isolationism, religious conservatism, and – more exclusively to the US – the disregard for the basic needs that people should be entitled to: education and health services of a level that citizens of wealthy nation deserve.


GIRL:
... and 2. things you admire (ex: initiative generally being encouraged)? Please elaborate!

STASH:
I admire that, through that sense of entitlement, it's possible to achieve a lot. I think the hurdles are more flexible in the US; you are encouraged to do things. I also feel that the US is, generally speaking, friendly to immigrants and they can more easily thrive despite origin.


GIRL:
We've talked a bit about the concept of "home." How has moving to another continent affected your view of home and belonging?

STASH:
It's made the concept of home more ambiguous. I think it was already on that path before I came to Europe. While the city of New York does feel like home, the feeling is detached from 20 CP for me. It's more attached to you (and 20 CP through you), and the personality and meaning of the city. I think before New York, in San Francisco, the place itself was more of a magnet. Maybe not because of what it had to offer, but because of what I was doing there. Also because of you and not in small part because we left less often. Because of that history, the thought of moving became harder and harder to consider. I think most people never leave because too much of their lives is attached to a place.

I'm glad I got off that track. Home is where we are together.

I've given up on belonging – the thought of it can be warm, but I don't think it's something I need. I think my childhood experiences made it that way. I belong with you. Even that was hard to adjust to when we first started dating. Now it's essential!


GIRL:
Any other thoughts about being in school/being away/being apart/looking foward?

STASH:
Being apart hasn't been easy, but I don't regret my choice of coming to school. The experience has been incredible, and I'll learn more from it that anything academic. I think being focused on school is the only way it could have happened. I'm glad I am where I am today, and I look forward to the rest of the summer here and the experience of being in school having you with me. I'm hopeful you won't resent me for it, and think we will both learn from it. Cheesy, I is!

HowTo: Fold a Shirt the Japanese Way

this blew my mind! Have fun figuring it out -- I did!